[NOTE: I treat and judge each person as an individual. The accident of birthtime is, by definition, not anyone's fault. However, being born under the sign of Aquarius, the unfortunate constellation we currently find ourselves dealing with, makes you suspect to me. To say the least. But never worry, I'm sure the Aquarian traits condemned in this emailpistolarysms post do not describe you. You are surely the one exceptional Aquarian who does not fit the bill. So just stay back in your utter oblivion, your abject unawareness of those around you, their feelings and their humanity. Stay back.]
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 2009 18:23:24
Subject: Thanks
From: Service M. Shrake <smshrake@sms.biz>
To: Blake Terdson-Borer <aquariass@zerodiacal.com>
hey, thank you for the lovely day at the zoo yesterday. this scorpio is glad he gave another aquarius another chance! maybe i’ve been too harsh/dogmatic in keeping you guys out of my life. after all, it’s impossible that such a huge number of people (all aquarians) could all be bad people, right? i need to be more logical from now on. i’m sorry it took so many tries and so much insisting for us to get together.
anyway, i had a grand time, especially on the walk home. when should we get together again? i’m going up to new york for a long weekend, but can we plan something for when i get back? S
Date: Mon, 21 Dec 2009 21:07:13
From: AquariAss
Subject: RE: Thanks
To: SM Shrake
Yay! I told you you were wrong about us Aquarians! We’re the best. 
>anyway, i had a grand time, especially on the walk home.
Me too! I still can’t believe we just just bumped into the macaca cage like that by accident. And don’t worry, I will always protect you from falling monkey dung. If you let me. And I hope you will. Text me or call me tomorrow or something.
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 09:45:15
Subject: Did you get my msg?
From: Service M. Shrake <smshrake@sms.biz>
To: Blake Terdson-Borer <aquariass@zerodiacal.com>
i thought we had a date for last night? is everything ok? now i’m confused and i have to say this is not shaping up to be a good day for aquarians in my book!
Date: Wed, 30 Dec 2009 20:34:09
From: AquariAss
Subject: RE: Did you get my msg?
To: SM Shrake
? are you mad 
I’m sorry
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 2009 00:13:20
Subject: RE: RE: Did you get my msg?
From: Service M. Shrake <smshrake@sms.biz>
To: Blake Terdson-Borer <aquariass@zerodiacal.com>
i’m not mad at you, you can’t help it, you’re just standard-issue aquarius garbage. you’re all basically sociopaths, but that doesn’t make you bad, it means you’re sick. congenitally defective. like, it’s like a birth defect.
i’m mad at *myself* for letting myself be fooled again.
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 2009 o0:24:10
From: AquariAss
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Did you get my msg?
To: SM Shrake
!!! a “sociopaths?!?” WHY? 
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 2009 01:02:34
Subject: RE: RE: Did you get my msg?
From: Service M. Shrake <smshrake@sms.biz>
To: Blake Terdson-Borer <aquariass@zerodiacal.com>
hmm. i don’t know why i’m taking time to type this, since you — and all of your aquarius friends — are insensate to the point of being no better than animals. but i’ll try, just for you, blake.
every aquarius i’ve ever met can impersonate a normal and even intriguing human being for a short while. very charming! but once that mask falls off, usually within a couple of hours’ time, the emptiness at your core … well, what does emptiness do? just sits there in its full uselessness. i don’t know what you are: plant, animal, mineral? none of the above? this is an innocent, honest question: how do you live, how do you get from A to B, when you are unable to honor any commitments big or small, when nothing anyone says to you registers? when nothing you say counts for anything? when you care about absolutely nothing that matters? or anything at all? aquarius – “the water bearer”? more like “the soullessness bearer”. the soul’s antipode. what not having a soul would look like, if it looked like anything.
the worse part is how much you lie, to yourself and others, about what you are. the extent to which you define nothingness is the extent to which you bill yourself as being: awesome. “no way, we’re the smartest!” well, define smart. you do know how to breath and not fall down too much. you can learn to drive a car or operate a computer, sure. it’s a singular confluence of absolute self-delusion by you and absolute obviousness of the truth about you to the rest of us (non-aquarians).
people criticize us scorpios, and we accept it and even laugh it off, because “you take the good with the bad” in this life. we’re human, unlike you. aquarians just fold under any criticism. you shut down like the robots you are. you can’t handle even a word of it. you are the worst, and yet you can’t admit even a whit of guilt. that’s called being a stub of a human being.
now, again, none of this is your fault. i’m not anti-aquarius in and of itself. but i just can’t be around any of them ever again. personal preference. i will be checking people’s signs and sticking to my rule from now on.
Date: Fri, 1 Jan 2010 11:22:09
From: AquariAss
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: Did you get my msg?
To: SM Shrake
Tags: Aquarians, Aquarius, Garbage, Subhuman