I Was Janis Joplin for College

I’ve always wanted to be a dead legend. “I’ll never see 30, man,” I said to my brother. He said, “Um, Scott: I think you are an expert on Janis Joplin, and you can imitate her, and we all know you like her a lot, but…” “What? Are you ashamed to have a rock star who died of a heroin overdose in the family?”

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Come on, I’ll Buy You a Headstone

On this Memorial Day, remember that you can honor someone who meant a lot to you by buying them a headstone if they don’t have one. It’s good for the soul to think about somebody else for a change. Blows the blues away, temporarily anyway.

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Remember Phone Books?

I’ve been thinking a lot about the ins and outs of fame—I was going to say “lately,” but that isn’t true. I’ve been thinking a lot about fame ever since I was able to think.

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