I cringed along with the rest of you during the holidays when Tareq and Michaele Salahi got busted for crashing a state dinner President Obama held for the prime minister of India. But for me it was personal. As the pictures of the outlaw couple posing proudly for pictures at the White House flickered across CNN, I said to myself, “Oh, man. The jig is up.”

I still have a Yahoo! email address, okay? It’s not as bad as still having AOL or Hotmail. Plus, I have a Gmail one too. So shut up. Anyway, so that I can check my email quickly first thing in the morning, Yahoo! is my homepage. They have very carnivalesque top-news stories, lots of self-help [...]

Circus freak is visibly excited to begin the masturbatory monologue he has transparently come in here to get off his chest.